random sometimes funny thoughts

Clowns In My Coffee

English: A photo of a cup of coffee. Esperanto...

English: A photo of a cup of coffee. Esperanto: Taso de kafo. Français : Photo d’une tasse de caffé Español: Taza de café (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

No one has to tell me to “Wake up and smell the coffee.” The minute the aroma wends it’s way to my nose, I’m on my feet (somewhat wobbly) and headed to the kitchen.

There’s nothing like waking up to (no not Folgers in your cup, unless that’s what you like) the smell of freshly brewed coffee permeating the entire house.

 I was first introduced to coffee as a curious child insisting on tasting my Nana’s steaming cup, but I’ve been a confirmed coffeeholic since my early teen years when my best friend introduced me to the effects of drinking a strong, black brew.  (She also introduced me to Streaking, but that’s another story)   At fourteen, memories of bitterness and scalding heat still lingered in my brain and I was reluctant to relive the experience. But Joni was persistent. She assured me that I would get used to the taste because the love of coffee is “an acquired taste.”

 I didn’t understand why anyone would want to eat or drink something they hated until they “acquired” a change of taste. It made no sense. You either like it or you don’t. ‘Nough said, right? You don’t know Joni. I finally capitulated and tentatively took a sip of her drink cooling on the dresser as she brushed her hair.

 It was disgusting. I looked around frantically for some place to spit it out, but realized the longer I searched, the longer the foul stuff was going to be flooding my taste buds. I choked it down. Joni drank her coffee with lots of cream and sugar. I don’t like drinks made syrupy with sugar, nor do I care for hot milk. I didn’t want to keep gagging the stuff down until I learned to like it. I was tired and wanted to go back to bed. Sleeping over at Joni’s always meant lack of sleep brought on by fits of giggles and whispered secrets.

 When I flopped back across the bed hoping for a few more minutes of blessed sleep, she started pulling on my feet until I landed with a painful thump on the floor. Apparently, one sip of the concoction was unacceptable. I was required to drink an entire cup! I complained profusely and threatened her with dire consequences if she didn’t let me go back to sleep. Fighting all the way, I gulped down the remaining sludge in her mug and fell back exhausted, closing my eyes in anticipation of the slumber so desperately needed.

 Five minutes later, I was still trying to sink into oblivion. I turned over and buried my head under my pillow, waiting for my usual state of coma. I tossed. I turned. I got up and pulled the blinds tightly closed. I shut the door, blocking out the dim light from the hallway. Nothing helped. It seemed I was wide awake. I gave up when I realized I wasn’t as tired as I thought. In fact, I was feeling pretty energetic.

 I threw on my clothes, brushed my hair, and even opted for a little mascara and lip gloss. With a bounce in my step and full of expectations for the day ahead, I strode into the kitchen. While I dumped cereal into a bowl, Joni poured herself another cup of coffee.

 “It’s great, isn’t it?” she asked.

 “What?” I was heartily chomping on Captain Crunch, but I didn’t think she was referring to the nutritional value.

 “It’s the coffee!” she laughed as I stopped in mid-chew looking at her in confusion. “That’s why you’re so wide awake and don’t feel tired. Caffeine.” She wiggled her brows up and down, “And it’s legal!”

 WHAT?!!!! I was amazed. I was elated. I felt cheated that no one had let me in on the wonders of coffee earlier in my life. I re-thunk my position on the acquired taste thing. Maybe it was worth it. Maybe the effects of coffee would be enough to change my dislike of the taste. I decided to give it a try, without the sugar and cream.

 I’ve since heard all the warnings and opinions about the bad health effects of drinking too much coffee. It can cause an increase in elevated blood pressure and higher incidents of cardiac events. I’ve also read all the newest reports now claiming the beneficial properties like prevention of cancer and lowered levels of depression. “Something”, no one’s sure exactly what, seems to help fight off Alzheimer’s Disease, and for Type 2 Diabetes…the more coffee consumption, the better.

 As I take another swill from my own cuppa Joe, I turn a skeptical eye toward my Google list of articles touting either the benefits or the harmful effects, depending on who is doing the touting. The truth is that we don’t really know, and the “experts” are just clowns in the media circus, vying to entertain us and make a name for themselves.

 Clowns…that reminds me of a 3 year old Noah (my grandson), dancing through the house as he belted out “Clowns in my coffee, clowns in my coffee! ‘Cause…you’re so vain…”




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